EVERY DAY AFFIRMATION FOR ABUNDANCE IN EVERY WAY

®    Every day in every way I am growing richer & richer.

®    Every day in every way my cash reserve is growing.

®    Every day in every way I am becoming prosperous.

®    Every day in every way I am becoming wealthy.

®  Every day in every way I am being prospered by Divine Power.

®  Every day in every way I am being prospered in all my interests.

®  Every day in every way money manifests in my life in rich abundance.

®  Every day in every way there is peace & prosperity in my palace.

®  Every day in every way I am activated by Divine Love.

®  Every day in every way I am guided by Divine Power.

®  Every day in every way I am protected by Divine power.

®  Every day in every way I am growing in my popularity.

பயனுள்ள வாழ்க்கை

Ò        பாரமார்த்திக நோக்கத்திலும் சக்தியிலும் தினமும் முன்னேறுவீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கைப் பயனுள்ளது.!

Ò        அனுதினமும் நேர்மையான குணத்தாலும் பொலிவினாலும் துலங்குவீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கைப் பயனுள்ளது.!

Ò        பிறருக்குப் பயனுள்ள வகையில் வாழ்வீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கைப் பயனுள்ளது.!

Ò        உங்களுடைய பொறுப்புகளை அவசிய பணிகளை மகிழ்ச்சியோடு ஏற்றுக்கொள்வீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கைப் பயனுள்ளது!

Ò        வாழ்க்கை நிலையை, வாழ்க்கைச் சூழலை சஞ்சலமற்ற நம்பிக்கையோடு சந்திப்பீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கைப் பயனுள்ளது.!

Ò        நியாயத்தின் பாதையில், நேர்மையான முறையில் பயணிப்பீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கை பயனுள்ளது.!

Ò        குற்றம்,துக்கம், நோவு நிறைந்த உலகிலும் நீங்கள் வலிமையுடனும், பிரகாசமாகவும் இருப்பீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கை பயனுள்ளது.!

Ò        படைத்தவனோடு சேர்ந்தே இருக்கிறீர்கள், படைத்தவனை சார்ந்தே இருக்கிறீர்கள் என்றால் வாழ்க்கை பயனுள்ளது!.

Ò        பகவான் தரும் பாதுகாப்பும் வழிகாட்டுதலும் தீர்மானமானது தவறாதது என்ற உணர்வில் அன்றாடம் வளர்ந்துகொண்டிருப்பீர்களானால் வாழ்க்கை பயனுள்ளது!

(O P GHAI ஆங்கில மூலத்தைத் தழுவி தமிழில் என் மொழியில்) .

 

வாழும் கலை – OP Ghai

வாழ்க்கை பற்றிய சில சிந்தனைகள்

  •  வாழும் கலையை அறிந்து பயனடைய வேண்டுமெனில் பல ஆண்டுகளாய் கடைபிடித்த கட்டுப்பாடு, கவனித்து அறிதல், அனுபவம் ஆகியவை தேவை.
  •  நம்முடைய தவறான கணிப்புகளையும், குறைகளையும், திருத்திக் கொள்ள அன்றாடம் வாய்ப்புகள் கொடுக்கப்படுகின்றன.
  • இன்னும் சிறப்பாகவும்,வித்தியாசமாகவும் எந்தெந்த காரியங்களை செய்திருக்கக்கூடுமென கவனித்தீர்களானால், உங்களுக்கு அன்றாடம் கிடைக்கும் அனுபவத்தைக் கொண்டு இன்னும் சிறப்பாக செய்து விடலாம். அதற்கு விழிப்புணர்வு போதும்.
  • வாழ்க்கை என்பது பள்ளிக்கூடம். என்ன செய்ய வேண்டும், என்ன செய்யக் கூடது, எப்படி திட்டமிட வேண்டும், எப்படி செயல்படுத்த வேண்டும் என்பதை கற்றுணரலாம்.
  • இந்த பள்ளியின் ஆசிரியர் சில சமயம் கடுமையாகவும், கருணையற்றவராகவும் தோன்றலாம்; ஆனால் இந்த கடுமையும், போதனையும் அப்போது வேதனையாகத் தோன்றினாலும் நம்முடைய நலனுக்கே என பின்னாளில் புரியும்.
  •  வாழ்க்கை என்னும் அற்புதமான கல்விக் கூடத்தில் கிடைக்கும் பாடத்தை நன்கு படித்தறியுங்கள்
  •  அவ்வப்போது ஏதேனும் சிக்கல் வந்தாலும் உறுதியாக இருங்கள் ஏனெனில் தீர்வு எங்கோ காத்திருக்கிறது. ஒருநாள் உங்களை உறுதியாக வந்தடையும்.

5 POINT FORMULA FOR EFFECTIVE LIVING

Leadership5POINT FORMULA for EFFECTIVE LIVING 

1. Being Optimistic –
Being positive about life is no more a choice but becomes a basic need for survival these days given the opportunity that people have & the access to every kind of life-style courtesy ‘world-wide-web’.
The luxury of leisurely life – leisurely wake-up, leisurely get ready, leisurely commute to work place, interact informally & intimately with people,  caring to share without being asked, weigh life with inclusive thinking – has been replaced by a high-tech, fast paced regimented life with an attitude of  ‘what is in it for me’ has been pushing people to fend for oneself .
If it becomes so, then one must become one’s own care-taker, motivator, and self-healer. Being self dependent is safe now-a-days to keep pace with advancement.
Unless one tunes the mind optimistically, unless one trains the mind to think positively, unless one looks for solutions, life will become more & more complicated.
Even now stress seems to become the order of the day. People seem to get upset easily, people become irritated at snap of fingers.

In order to make the most of everything in life, one must develop an attitude of seeing the brighter side of life; in fact one must see life as an opportunity for growth & advancement, treat every life situation as a learning ground for strengthening self.
Though it is easier said than done, yet one must cultivate the attitude seeing life as an opportunity by ‘choosing’ to be optimistic.
That your life is thrilling or pulling or killing depends on the filling in your head; hence take care of your thoughts, then life is taken care of’– VR Quote

2.Believing in one’s ability-

Of all the strengths in the world, the only thing that stands by a man at times of crisis is his courage of conviction.
What a man thinks of himself to be is what decides his behavior in any situation.
If I can say, man’s effectiveness is proportionate to his identity than the ability he possesses. Therefore much more than knowledge acquired, skills learnt, experience gained, one must ‘believe’ in one’s ability, whatever be the proportion & measure, and perform with full faith that one can give one’s best at all circumstance.
You may not be the best person under the sun; yet you can give your best under the sun at all circumstance fully believing in your ability.
This belief in one’s ability sharpens focus & polishes skill on an ongoing basis; this will gradually make a person gain expertise in the chosen field.

The greatest deterrent to success is not just lack of ability, but lack of belief in one’s ability.
Self doubt & perfection syndrome are the arch rivals for personal effectiveness.
‘There is no word that has no power;
There is no herb that has no medicinal value;
There is no human who is absolutely worthless’
– a Sanskrit  saying
Hence in order to succeed & grow one must identify one’s strength & work on one’s strength.
For this to happen BELIEVE you have abilities and you can succeed;
keep saying –
‘I believe in the ability of my own self & generate powerful results’

 

3. Being curios to learn & grow

Being positively discontent is best
lest complacency cripples us to rust’

VR Quote
All great leaders are avid readers. They are curious to know what is new in their chosen field. They keep their eyes, ears and  mind open to receive new learning, new ways of doing, new methods to optimize resources.

A sedentary routine may give a sense of security but it is only a temporary respite. What gives growth & maturity is challenging oneself and taking risk to renew oneself, to rejuvenate oneself with new learning.
Stagnation is indeed a sickness in disguise.
New leaning keeps the brain cells active and lightens up life and retains youthful spirit.
Life is counted not by the number of years lived but by the number of hours spent in useful tasks.
Much of life’s problems can be easily solved by taking a fresh look at it, by altering our approach to the same situation.
Failures & mistakes become best teacher if only we learn to take them as an opportunity for learning; In fact growth && expansion has come only by treating mistakes & failure as a feedback.
In fact if one develops a child like curiosity, then nothing like it to freshen up life.
Make it a habit to be curious about your immediate life circumstance and start learning everyday something new.
Then life will always be fresh

 

4 Appreciating the best in others

It is a basic fact of life that no man in a society can live all alone without needing the support of fellow human beings.
Equally it is a basic need of man to be connected to people. A sense of belonging certainly gives comfort.
Pleasure lies in giving, sharing, exchanging, and serving relatives friends & close associates.
True success lies in having a well meaning connectedness with people around, not just the attainment of honors, medals or material possessions. Even with these one will feel empty if not surrounded by people with sincerity & warmth.

In order to have a well meaning relationship with people, develop the habit of appreciating the good things in others and candidly recognize them.
We are so habituated to finding fault with others, and often claim to be better than the rest that we miss out the charm of peaceful co-existence and supplementing and complimenting one another.
The best way to establish a well knit of net-work is by inculcating the habit of spotting good things in others;
If I can use Spencer Johnson’s phrase ‘catch them doing good’

Focus on what people are doing well, what they are good at, what each person is capable of and nurture that in them and make the most out of the strength that people have; Help people to strengthen their strength.
In turn they will stand with you willingly, voluntarily.
Life has meaning if only we care & share with people.
Hence to have personal effectiveness, start appreciating the best in others.

“CARE, SHARE, PROSPER” –VR Quotes

5.Finding a balance between personal and professional life

Gone are the days of settled type; a person starting his career in an organization retiring from the same organization; Job hop is the order of the day.
Being career oriented is even among women these days.
The percentage of working couples is on the increase.
Acquiring property, amassing wealth seems to occupy one’s thinking obsessively.

The basic question is life is spent only in making a living, then when are we going to live?

Value clarification is what is needed to find meaning & purpose to life.
Decide what you want, I repeat, what you want most and work for it.
Personal life & professional life are two sides of a talisman.
Balancing it is important for a healthy peaceful living.
Effectiveness lies in striking a balance.

 

LIFE is Living In Full Enthusiasm
– VR Quote

Thoughts on CONFIDENCE

v  CONFIDENCE is constancy of thinking about what is possible & how to make it possible

v  CONFIDENCE is a special kind of thinking that is fuelled by unflinching determination

v  CONFIDENCE is making the mind see now what the eyes are going to see soon

v  CONFIDENCE is sensing the possibility before making it a reality

v  CONFIDENCE means facing facts boldly with a strong mind

v  CONFIDENCE is your perception of your potential

v  CONFIDENCE is seeing the possibility as  reality

v  CONFIDENCE is a resolute state of mind

v  CONFIDENCE means being  pushy

v  CONFIDENCE is knowing & going

v  We tend to view CONFIDENCE as a product of accomplishment rather than a part of process that leads there

v  Supremely CONFIDENT people were confident before they achieve anything

v  There are two types of CONFIDENCE –
-Conviction based CONFIDENCE which is primarily by  faith backed by a strong will;
-Competence based CONFIDENCE which comes as an effect of certain demonstratable abilities;

v  To develop CONFIDENCE simply state within –
“ I greet everyday with a firm commitment to raising my CONFIDENCE; I do whatever that is required to become more CONFIDENT”

 

 

 

 

 

GESTALT PRAYER

I do my thing and you do your thing
I am not in this world to live up to your expectation
And you are not in this world to live up to mine
You are you and I am I
And if by chance we find each other it’s beautiful
If not it can’t be helped

COMMITMENT

Thoughts on COMMITMENT
(as shared from random readings, hence source not known)

  • Commitment is giving all that you have to get all that you want
  • A true commitment is the focusing of energy toward a purpose or cause
  • Commitment is doing rather than saying
  • Commitment is persevering & continuing to pursue your vision in spite of distraction hardship criticism & risk
  • Commitment is not a vague promise to yourself that you will do something
  • Commitment is doing something because you believe it is right for you to do it
  • Commitment like confidence is a special kind of thinking, a single minded sense & purpose that is fuelled by the energy of personal vision
  • Commitment is something you live & love
  • Everything you do is a reflection of your commitment
  • No one can help you overcome a lack of commitment to your own life
  • If you don’t have it no one can provide for you
  • Honoring commitment is honoring oneself

INFLUENCE, CEASE TO CONTROL

YOU CAN ONLY INFLUENCE, CAN’T CONTROL

In this high-tech fast paced world where everything is available at your call, at your door step, where knowledge of every kind is open to understanding and scrutiny at our will & poise, where relationship at every level, be it family, society or profession, have assumed a new dimension, in that the old practice of implicit obedience to age or authority or hierarchy is replaced by independent approach to issues airing one’s preference and choice and opinion it becomes hard bite to get your way these days simply by age old traditional model of command & control.

We are forced to communicate; we are forced to express our stand; we are forced to explain our logic or sentiment behind our decisions & thought process. People are not ready to take things on the face of it. We need to convince people to make them understand in the first place; next we need to get their acceptance.

So power or authority no more wields command like in the past. We need a new mind-set, new way to approach life and that new way is our ‘POWER TO INFLUENCE’

We must really influence people around by the way we conduct, by the way we communicate, and by the way we connect with people.

In order to develop the power to influence a simple ground rule for effective interpersonal relationship is winning the confidence of people with whom we interact

.

To win the confidence –
1) our intention & attention are two factors that make us irresistible to people around us

2) For BEST relationship
Begin the interaction
Establish warmth
Satisfy needs
Thank profusely

If the above strategy is adopted one is sure to create a platform for influencing people.

With the power to influence one enlist cooperation and commitment from people willfully joyously; one may expect a voluntary participation for a common cause; interaction becomes smoother.

Life becomes easier.

Influence, refrain from control.

NLP

NLP Case Study 3

CASE STUDY 3

SITUATION:-

Siva has come to be the departmental head in the organization. He comes from another organization which has a different work culture, a rigid & authoritarian set-up where sub ordinates are expected to be very formal in interaction with higher –ups, do not use name in addressing the boss, do not confront openly. He is used to seeing only submissive team members; whereas in the new organization he has joined he is in for cultural shock; team members address him by name; seem to be more informal in approach and interaction. Though he finds the team members to be efficient at work, he is not able to control them or influence them. He has started feeling he is not in control of his department and may lose out if it continues. He is not able to express this out too. Yet Siva wants to be in control

 

UNDERSTANDING THE SITUATION  

Siva is uncomfortable in his new role is a fact; whereas the evidence for his conclusion is not appropriate. He is not able to adapt to the new work culture because he is not able to understand his team members; the open & direct interaction approach of his team members appear to him as disrespect to his authority.

Now what is important in the situation is Siva becoming comfortable in interacting and understanding his team members.

How can we help Siva with NLP intervention?

PROCESS OF NLP INTERVENTION FOR MANAGERIAL COUNSELING

RAPPORT gives comfort in inter personal relationship

Rapport is the good feeling one gets when in the company of somebody one likes or like one.

There is a saying “LIKE likes LIKE”

Rapport is the intelligent approach to influencing. Putting your own agenda on hold is a prerequisite for rapport. Listening and being curious are critical to the learning process and they are fundamental component of building rapport.

Rapport is a bonding at unconscious level.

One of the important traits of a team leader is to understand his team members & accept their uniqueness. If the leader can appreciate & recognize their individuality he also gains acceptance.

How to build RAPPORT?

1. VERBAL RAPPORT

2. NON VERBAL RAPPORT

VERBAL RAPPORT: – In order to gain rapport with an individual , one can restate the individual’s style of expression, in terms of peculiar phrases, passwords, slang, in conversation and also mirror his/her tempo & style in communication. This will make the respondent more responsive & comfortable

NON VERBAL RAPPORT: – In the interaction face to face if one mirrors and matches the posture & gesture of the other person, rapport is gradually gained.

This process of mirroring and matching the other person’s style is called PACING and if one can comfortably pace, then consequently one will be able to lead the other person effortlessly.

 

Now coming to the case study, Siva now must step down from his ‘one above’ stand to ‘one among the team in lead role’

For this Siva must freely & informally engage in small talk with his members understand their interest, preferences, values; find those that match with his and state them

Also mirror & match their language & physiology.

This will remove the barrier developed unconsciously and bring in comfort in the interaction. The members are efficient; only the bonding between SIVA & members must be strengthened. This Rapport building techniques will do that.

 

SUMMARY:-

Rapport is the foundation for any meaningful interaction between two or more people- whether it relates to sales, negotiation, providing information, direction to a co-worker, a conversation with family members, during training or coaching.

Rapport is about establishing an environment of trust, understanding, respect, and safety, which gives all people the freedom to fully express their ideas and concerns and know that these will be respected by the other person.

Rapport does not mean one person must agree with what the other person says or does. Instead each person appreciates the other’s view & respects their model of the world.

When you are in rapport with another person, you have the opportunity to enter their world & see from their perspective; appreciate why they feel the way they do, and arrive at a better understanding of who they are; as a result the whole relationship is enhanced.

RAPPORT is the port to anchor relationship

NLP

NLP CASE STUDY 2

CASE STUDY 2

SITUATION

With the business climate changing & moved towards globalization, like many organization XYZ company too has changed its culture and style. Employees no more could ride on the comfort of just loyalty & seniority. Productivity & adaptability decided sustainability.
In this situation Ragu , a long time employee has started feeling left behind & insecure. He believes he cannot work with computers, SAP, 5S & so on ; He starts feeling humane touch is now lost; Ragu has started believing company has become task oriented & no more people oriented, and so he may be shown the door anytime.

With this fear he approaches his boss seeking assistance & understanding, help.

UNDERSTANDING THE SITUATION

Ragu has lost confidence in his ability to cope up with the changing scenario. He has poor self image. If he is allowed to continue with this frame of mind he will certainly attract what he doesn’t want to happen.

Ragu must be helped to restore confidence in him & also repose faith in the organization.

PROCESS OF NLP INTERVENTION FOR COUNSELING

One of the fundamental beliefs of NLP is ‘People already have all the resources they need’

THINKING according to NLP: – NLP has minutely studied people when they were thinking.

According to NLP, this is also a fact, when people think they form pictures, words/sounds, feelings inside their head about the subject of thinking.

Thus there is VISUAL thinking, AUDITORY thinking, and KINESTHETIC thinking.

Five senses seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling, tasting are the modes by which a man senses the world and sends it to brain where he makes sense of the sensory impulses.

In the process of giving meaning to this sensory experience he makes his perception and that perception becomes his reality.

For practical purpose NLP takes smelling & tasting as feeling; so man has three modes of experiencing world – VISUAL, AUDITORY, KINESTHETIC.

For each of these modes there are sub- modes embedded within.

Visual Sub Modalities: – size of the picture, color of the picture, brightness, still/moving, 2D/3D, distance of the picture from self.

Auditory Sub modalities: – volume, tone, intermittent/ continuous, location, distance from self

Kinesthetic sub modalities: – temperature, pressure, location, texture, intensity, distribution

These SUB MODALITIES are the building blocks of an experience. In other words sub modalities are the ingredients of an experience; structure of an experience. Sub modalities are the internal representation of an experience.

What is the difference between how we produce the state of depression or the state of joy? The main difference is in the way we structure our internal experience.

If an experience is joyous NLP does not simply see the content (what has given joy, say ice cream) but at the internal representation (of ice cream).

Likewise for sorrow, bitterness, disappointment etc.

If one wants to change one’s bitterness of an event, NLP asks the subject first to take an inventory of sub-modalities & then by altering the sub-modalities of visual auditory, kinesthetic one can gradually reduce the degree of bitterness and finally move to a better situation.

Coming to the case study:-

Now to help Ragu develop faith in his ability to learn & adapt to the changing scenario, Ragu must be made to believe he is capable of learning, he is capable coping.

Ragu must be asked to recall a situation from his past when he learnt something new & he was thrilled by it; perhaps something he attempted on his own and gained confidence.

Now Ragu must be asked to relive that past  situation now inside his head; see hear feel all those  he experienced then; He must also notice the emotional state as he does this process of figuring out the structure of that experience.

Having noted the entire sub – modalities, Ragu must now gradually substitute these sub modalities for the work situation and check for the emotional response.

Surprisingly Ragu will find that he is capable of changing learning coping with the current scenario; His self image will get brightened.

SUMMARY 

SUB MODALITY is a unique finding of NLP; anything & everything of subjective experience can easily be changed.

To change a repulsive experience to an acceptable experience, inside your head, simply push the distance of the picture, dim it further, make it still, reduce the volume of sound, make the sound intermittent, and reduce the density & intensity of feeling; that’s all. It is amazing that the quality of experience changes.

By altering the structure of experience quality of experience can be changed.

One can always feel  in control in any situation by gaining familiarity and proficiency in identifying and altering sub modalities appropriately.

It is not what happens in life that matters. What we do with what happens in life that matters.