Focus Matrix


The article is written getting inspiration from a thought given by Timothy Gallwey in his book The INNER GAME of WORK.
The following matrix is an extension of Timothy’s thought on focus
Focus is the key to success in any endeavor, be it leading, be it managing, be it coaching, be it listening , whatever the work , focus marks the difference that makes the difference.
It is our experience that the moment we want to focus on the task on hand, from somewhere into the mind distraction creeps in and seeps in and spoils the charm of attention.
We are forced to make a conscious effort to drive away distraction. This could either fatigue us or frustrate us.
Timothy Gallwey talks of ‘inner environment’ for focus. Gallwey observes that the reason for distraction is anxiety, or stress or boredom. He says if the challenge is too much and the needed support is not available, then anxiety and stress distracts us from focus; on the contrary too little challenge and enough support gives boredom,
Based on this example I have extended his thought to draw a matrix and consolidated human mind’s response to life situation around us.
How we are impacted by the climate around us is illustrated in the matrix now.

Quadrant 1 : Too much challenge and not enough support
Sense of certainty gives security. Security is what people seek, yet people look for challenge in a safe environ to fill the thrill of the brain. At the same time if the challenge is too much and not enough safety or support is provided, then performance anxiety sets in causing stress and fatigue. This stress distracts the individual from focusing peacefully on the task
Autocratic Leadership style is reflected in this climate

Quadrant 2 : Too much challenge with sufficient support & safety
We can say this is an ideal condition for productivity and undeterred focus to give one’s best. In this eustress fills the mind powering the effort for faster results. Positive outcome is spontaneously expected and all our attention is fully focused on the task on hand. There is no iota of doubt or disbelief about positive outcome and so there is absorbed attention to details leading to successful outcome or goal achievement.

Servant leadership is reflected in this model here

Quadrant 3 : Too little challenge and not sufficient support
Perhaps this is a non-conducive atmosphere for learning and development, If the individual is not challenged by any task, where there is no predetermined dead line, where there are no parameters for performance evaluation, the mind will automatically drift and dive to what next. A moment to moment existence may sap the energy leading to despondency and doubt, thereby loss of self-assurance for any future challenges. Focus is the first casualty in this atmosphere
This model reflects Laissez-faire leadership style

Quadrant 4: Too little challenge and enough support
When members go through motion without any challenge they tend to fall into a sedentary routine leading to boredom. There are no demands, there is no accountability, and so here too anxiety may set in about prospects for growth and development.
Bureaucratic leadership style creates this kind atmosphere.

Conclusion:
Focus is a matter of mental discipline. Discipline gets inculcated by inner and outer climate which dynamically impact each other.
True inspiration comes by challenging one’s own limits on an ongoing basis. For this self-initiative to become a part of nature, sufficient nurturing is needed from the atmosphere.
Any organization that focuses on employee empowerment through planned learning & development finds its people in quadrant 2

V RANGANATHAN,
www.vrnlp.com

Law of Attraction and ThiruvaLLuvar

Law of Attraction in the words of ThiruvaLLUvar

 I now find ThiruvaLLUvar has well defined the ways for attracting   prosperity success and well-being in life.

Law of Attraction as a topic has attracted more people to reading the principles of law of attraction leading to prosperity peace healing and health

Law of Attraction is a fascination for almost all self-development aspirants.  In my experience I found that people who seek my counseling for their financial difficulties invariably ask about Law of Attraction to get more money immediately, more immediately than the wink of eyes to wriggle out of pressing debt

Many still think a strong visualization or repeating affirmation will by itself do the magic of prosperity downpour. The truth is it is not enough to clearly visualize.

What should happen for Law of Attraction to work?

For Law of Attraction to work following conditions are mandated.

ThiruvaLLUvar through his ThirukkuraL beautifully shows the path for prosperity in life. Let me explain the conditions for prosperity taking the advice from ThirukkuraL.

FEELING;

Feeling is the fuel that powers your imagination to become a manifested reality. Feeling powers your words to become your results.

Universal Intelligence responds to the vibration of feeling.

To say in the words of NLP, the psychology of excellence visual construct of your dream   is dissociated from you and so you are away from   it. Whereas feeling your visual construct is associated and so you are in it. You are in your aspiration, dream, and goal. It means you own it. What you own you have won.

It is not the detail of visualization alone; it is not the precision of words for affirmation alone that allows manifestation to happen   in your life. It is the intensity with which you feel as if it is true for you now that make your dream come true.

எண்ணிய எண்ணியாங்கு எய்துப எண்ணியார்
திண்ணியர் ஆகப் பெறின் (குறள் 666)
Meaning :
The will to do achieves the deed
when the mind to do is strong indeed

ThiruvaLLUvar advocates that when the mind is determined to achieve than merely wishing and wanting, then attaining becomes easy

It is feeling that makes your mind strong.  Feel from the depth of your heart as if it is true for you now or in the near future,

உள்ளியது எய்தல் எளிதுமன் மற்றும்தான்
உள்ளியது உள்ளப் பெறின்

Meaning of  kural:
what we want it is easy to attain well
If the thought is repeatedly directed to dwell

Repeatedly reminding on the goal and with all eagerness and expectation   if we keep thinking on it, then it is just a matter of time for us to get what we want as per universal law of order.

2.NON JEALOUS

For Law of Attraction to work the mind needs to focus on abundance and possibility of abundance. The vibrations of abundance in our thought attract wealth.

The distractor of this LOA force is JEALOUSY.

It may be natural and   normal to feel jealous of others’ attainment.  Human we are and human we remain.

At the same time for extra-ordinary accomplishments and attainments to happen in life we must move away from ordinaries.

Jealousy is anti -divine. The moment you feel jealous you vibrate with poverty and limitations. So even what you have on hand may start depleting. The future possibilities too may shun from you.

Thiruvalluvar says

அவ்வித்து அழுக்கறு உடையானை செய்யவள்
தவ்வையைக் காட்டி விடும் (குறள் 167)

Meaning:

Fortune deserts the envious
Leaving misfortune ominous.

ThiruvaLLUvar says jealousy saps prosperity and brings in misfortune. The moment you entertain jealousy the goddess of prosperity leaves you and misfortune stays permanently.

Rejoice in the success of others. That is the only way to attract success wealth prosperity. Good fortune will soon reach you.

  1. NON COVETING

Coveting includes every aspect of taking away from someone what rightfully belongs to them.

It can be cash, kind, fame, labor, or credit.

Coveting   need not mean only grabbing a grossly visible object from someone. Coveting also means paying less for service rendered. Coveting also means playing trick to pay less or gain more.

Coveting also means not paying your dues to someone who has not asked  you for it.

Coveting also means talking ill of someone, taking a dig at their worth, esteem or respect

ThiruvaLLUvar says

உள்ளத்தால் உள்ளலும் தீதே பிறன்பொருளை
கள்ளத்தால் கள்வேம் எனல் (குறள் 282)

Meaning :

“We will by fraud win other’s wealth”

 Even this thought is sin and stealth.

Even by thought we should not consider to grab another’s wealth, even that is a sin.

மறந்தும் பிறங்கேடு சூழற்க சூழின்
அறம்சூழும் சூழ்ந்தவன் கேடு (குறள் 204)

Meaning

His ruin is guaranteed by virtue’s action
that plans ruin for others by reaction

So never harbor ill will for anyone even  if they do harm to you if you want LOA to work for you

So what will be the reward if we do not covet someone’s property?

ThiruvaLLUvar guarantees
அறன் அறிந்து வெஃகா அறிவுடையார் சேரும்
திறன் அறிந்து ஆங்கே திரு (குறள் 179)

Meaning:
Fortune seeks the just and wise
Who are free from coveting vice.

Wealth reaches those appropriately who stay away from any kind of vice like coveting from others.  Such a person need not struggle to reach wealth, wealth reaches those people.

Forgive those who harm you
Thank those who charm you

  1. NON RESENTING.

One of the toughest traits that people face is inculcating non resenting attitude

For Law of Attraction to work non resenting attitude is mandate

A mind free from anger, ill-will, grudge or revenge alone is able to vibrate at a frequency that attracts wealth from Universe.

ThiruvaLLUvar says,

உள்ளியது எல்லாம் உடன் எய்தும் உள்ளத்தால்
உள்ளான் வெகுளி எனின் (குறள் 309)

Meaning
Wishes he gains as he wishes
If man refrains from rage vicious!

All that a man desires by heart he can attain easily immediately if the man is free from anger,
Free from anger means not just ‘ not expressing’ anger, it is not even harboring even an   iota of anger in the mind.

கதம்காத்துக் கற்றுஅடங்கல் ஆற்றுவான் செல்வி
அறம் பார்க்கும் ஆற்றின் நுழைந்து (குறள் 130)

Meaning:
Virtue seeks and peeps to see
Self-controlled savant anger free.

Wealth and righteous way will be waiting for the right time to reach out to the righteous man who is free from anger or rage.  He is cool as cucumber.

  1. SINCERE INTENTION

More than the perfection of action it is the intention behind the action that merits the quality of an action.  It is intention that attracts or repels prosperity.

Whatever you want you  need to intend fully wholly and impregnate that in the Universal mind.

If it is done Universal Intelligence automatically responds to your intention

ThiruvaLLUvar beautifuly explains this

குடிசெய்வல் என்னும் ஒருவற்குத் தெய்வம்
மடிதற்றுத் தான்முந் துறும்   (குறள் 1023)

Meaning
When one resolves to raise his race
God resolves to lead his ways

When the intent to patronize his kith & kin is strong in an individual, then God or Divine Intelligence automatically comes forward to lead his life towards prosperity wealth and success.

Also ThiruvaLLuvar says

சூழாமல் தானே முடிவெய்தும் தம்குடியைத்
தாழாது உஞற்று பவர்க்கு ( குறள் 1024)

Meaning:
Who raise their races with ceaseless pain
No need for plan; their ends will gain

If a man ceaselessly strives to raise the standard of his  kith and kin with sincere intention then victorious ways will automatically open up and ideas and opportunities will automatically open up.

  1. SHARE and CARE

Whatever be the current situation  in life, an attitude of sharing  what you can and caring for fellow human is important for prosperity to manifest in life.

The giver gains .

காக்கைக் கரவா கரைந்து உண்ணும் ஆக்கமும்
அன்னநீ ரார்க்கே உள (குறள் 527)

Meaning

The crows hide not; thy call and eat
welfare abides a man of heart

Just like the crow caws to invite its flock to share its discovery of food , if a man can share his possession generously with kith and kin , then only with such a man wealth will prefer to abide.

அகனமர்ந்து செய்யாள் உறையும் முகனமர்ந்து
நல்விருந்து ஓம்புவான் இல்  (குறள்  84)

Meaning :
The goddess of wealth will gladly rest

Where smiles welcome the worthy guest.

பகுத்துண்டு பல்லுயிர் ஓம்புதல் நூலோர்
தொகுத்தவற்றுள் எல்லாம் தலை  (குறள் 322)

Meaning:
Sharing what you have and caring for lives
is the law ahead of all in the words of wise

ThiruvaLLUvar advocates for sharing our good things with others and caring for their well-being will naturally do well to you in life. That is the law, greatest of all laws as enacted  by wise gurus.

Go Extra mile – For Law of Attraction to work, you must form a habit to go extra-mile, meaning give more than a person deserves or needs.  In the barter of life give more than what you receive.  When you offer service, serve more than you receive.

Conclusion:
Law of attraction is as ancient as the universe is.  A mind free from anger greed envy covetousness automatically attracts all good things in life says ThiruvaLLur. Let us enrich our life with sincere intention and righteous living.  Attract success wealth prosperity into your life
Pray ThirukkuRaL guides you to all success in life!

Like NLP keeps a person resourceful positive and wealthy, ThirukkuraL reflects law of attraction principles for wealthy living

 
Author : V RANGANATHAN, NLP Specialist, PCC ICF

www.vrnlp.com

Coaching and NLP –

Coaching
and NLP 
 
There are a lot of parallels and similarities between
Coaching and Neuro-Linguistic Program in the approach to empowering people.
 
I draw here those parallels in a succinct way more to
highlight than to explain in detail with the expectation to arouse in the mind
of the reader curiosity to know more on NLP.
 
I liberally use here words of John Whitemore from the
book ‘Coaching for performance’.
The sentences in italics
in blue font are quoted from John Whitmore’s book.
The sentences in black font are parallels
from NLP in my words.
 
1. Coaching focuses on future possibilities and not past mistakes 
NLP also clearly says to focus on the
outcome and   not sit content with what
happened. NLP is outcome oriented. NLP is more interested in what one’s wants
to happen than analyzing more on what happened. NLP is futuristic
.
 
2. The Coachee does acquire the facts, not from the coach but from within himself,
stimulated by the coach
One of the beliefs of excellence of NLP is
‘People already have all the resources they need or can create one’.
The role of NLP is to facilitate the subject or client to bring out their
best.  NLP strongly believes that people
are endowed with ‘positives’ and that if they don’t remember to employ in a
context, NLP helps to identify and implement. Thus the role of NLP is more like
a catalyst.
So NLP helps the client to figure our solution for her problem than instructing
a solution.
 
3. Coaching is unlocking a
person’s potential to maximize their own performance. It is helping them to
learn rather than teaching
 
Though NLP is outcome- oriented it does
not dictate or decide the outcome of the client. NLP strongly believes that
client consciously or non-consciously knows what is best for him.
NLP acknowledges the ‘map of reality’ of the client.  Map of reality is current understanding of
the client.  Then NLP asks appropriate
questions to understand the goal of the client.
Thereafter NLP employs suitable and appropriate intervention to help the
client reach their goal
.
 
4.  The expressions ‘to get the best out of
someone’ and ‘your hidden potential’ imply that more lies within the person
waiting to be released.  Unless the
manager or coach believes that people possess more capability than they are
currently expressing, he will not be able to help them express it. He (Coach)
must think of his people in terms of their potential, not their performance
We
must see people in terms of their future potential, not their past performance.
 
The following 3 beliefs of excellence of
NLP will vindicate that   NLP considers people as potentially complete
and whole.
 
1.      People
already have all the resources they need
2.      People
work perfectly
3.      If one
can do anyone can do
 
These 3 beliefs of NLP presuppose that
people are endowed with the capability to give their best and in their
intention they want to give their best.  
If at all they don’t perform to the expected level, it is their strategy
that has disappointed them and not their capability to perform. 
NLP intervenes
appropriately to bring out the potential into action and get the result the
client wants.
 
5. Self-belief is the key to the manifestation of potential and performance
The
underlying intent of every coaching intervention is to build the coachee’s
self-belief
 
The endeavor of every NLP intervention is
to first put the client in a resourceful state, meaning ‘can do’ state of mind.
A resourceful state of mind is a positive state of mind which thinks of
possibilities and tends to move towards solution than dwelling on difficulties
and simply analyzing on problems and difficulties.

 
6. For coaching to work at its best the relationship between the
coach and the coachee must be one of partnership in the endeavor, of trust, of
safety and of minimal pressure.  Coach –Coachee
relationship is non-threatening and supportive
 
Rapport is one of the six pillars of NLP.  To be in rapport within and without is
important for effectiveness.  

Before NLP intervention with the client, NLP points to two check points –
1) Are you in a resourceful state of mind?
2) Are you in rapport with your client?
 
Establishing rapport is a prerequisite for
client intervention for rapport marks the quality of interaction. 

Rapport facilitates smooth interaction. 

With rapport the client will feel relaxed and so in a non-threatening situation
the client will freely express.
 
6. Building awareness and responsibility is the essence of good coaching.  The first key element of coaching is
AWARENESS.  Increased awareness gives
greater clarity of perception
 
The purpose of NLP is to increase
awareness, to be aware of what is going on in you and around you. 
According to NLP the moment you are aware
your organism takes care of it and that awareness cures
.
 
Awareness
rising is the act of sharpening acuity of our input receptors, often tuning our
senses but also engaging our brain
For clean & open sensory channel NLP
has sensory acuity exercise to sharpen awareness.
This sharpening of senses exercise gives ‘here & now attention’ that
drastically increases attention density.
 
7. No two human minds are or bodies same.
How can I tell you how to use yours to their best? Only you can discover
how with your awareness
 
NLP says we are unique.  No two humans are exactly same.  According NLP each must find his own road to
freedom.
 
NLP does not believe in fixing clients.
NLP does not brand or bracket clients.
Each and every event must be understood in the context of its
happening.  Each person must be approached
with a fresh eye. 

NLP says ‘We must acknowledge and respect the model of the clients’ world”  

We are not the standard to measure someone.
The client must be understood or evaluated with their frame of reference
and parameters   they hold.

Our potential is realized by optimizing our own individuality and uniqueness,
never by molding them to another’s opinion of what constitutes best practice.
 
8. RESPONSIBILITY is the other key concept or goal of coaching. Responsibility is
crucial for high performance. When we truly accept, choose, or take
responsibility for our thoughts and our actions, our commitment to them rises
and so does our performance
 
It is interesting to note that NLP
emphasizes greatly on self-responsibility for change and growth.  


For change to happen, that too lasting change to happen, two
important factors are –
 ‘I take responsibility for my outcome and I surrender to the process of change’.


Being responsible is a key factor for NLP intervention. 
 
Unless the
client is ready to own the ‘problem’ or ‘need’ and unless the client chooses
what she wants, NLP cannot in any way impose anything to bring the change
.
 
9. (G) GOAL SETTING
Coaching aims to eliminate both the external
and internal obstacles to achievement of goal
Goals must be realistic, legal, ethical and
environmentally sound
.
NLP
talks of ‘Well –Formed Outcome’ where the client is allowed space to define
goal and design the way to achieve it taking full responsibility for the
benefit and consequence of goal achievement.
10.  (R) REALITY  
To approach REALITY
potential distortions of both coach and coachee must be bypassed.
The coach should use and
as far as possible encourage the coachee to use descriptive terminology rather
than evaluative terminology.
According to NLP ‘REALITY’ is
a mental construct of the client taken to be true.  It is true for the client in his ‘map of the
world’
We must respect an individual’s map as being true for them without
colouring  it with our conclusions . 
Being detached (non-judgmental) is important to help the client
figure out solution or to achieve goal.
REALITY QUESTIONS
The questions need to
demand high resolution of focus to obtain the detail of high quality input.
The reality answers
sought should be descriptive , non-judgmental, to ensure honesty and accuracy
The answers must be of
sufficient quality and frequency to provide the coach with a feedback loop.
CLEAN QUESTIONS of NLP are questions that open the descriptive channels
of answers.
Clean questions allow the client to express in their terms and as
they perceive it and not as the client what you want to hear.
Clean questions open the channel for unreserved expression.
Coaches will need to be
especially alert, listening, and watching to pick up all the clues that
indicate the direction of questioning to be followed.
In NLP UPTIME
is where your awareness is outside, aware and
not inside.
Uptime is when you are fully tuned to outside, around you, when you are
alive and alert to everything happening around you in a non-judgmental way.
The coach does not need to know the whole
history of the situation but merely to be certain that the coachee is clear
about it
NLP does not work with the content but only with the process.
When a client approaches with a problem, NLP does not sit to hear
the full history from beginning to end.
The drama of the event may sometimes distort the whole purpose and process
of intervention.
So NLP will ask the subject or client where they are now and where
they want to go. 
NLP works more with process and outcome, than the history of the
problem.
11.  (O)OPTIONS
The purpose of options
stage is not to find the right answer but to create and list as many
alternatives courses of action as possible.
One of the beliefs of excellence of NLP is “The person who is most flexible gains control over the
situation”
 The person with flexibility
finds choices for reaching the goal easily and effectively optimizing the
resources on hand.
NLP has tools to tap the creative thinking process of the brain to
think in new ways .
12. (W) Way forward
What will you do to
convert discussion into decision?
It is the construction of
an action plan to meet requirement that has been clearly specified.
NLP’s specialty is programming the brain for specific action in that
NLP is an excellent tool available to help coachee achieve goal not by WILL but
by an even more powerful mind tool called IMAGINATION. 
Imagination works wonders and creative imagination is very conducive
for achieving goals.
Conclusion:
Coaching & NLP have a lot in common
in helping people perform at their peak level.
Coaching as a process for performance
effectiveness can choose to use NLP tools for efficacy and ease of
intervention.
This article is made to throw light on
commonalities. 
NLP
can well complement and supplement coaching process.
NLP fully acknowledges that people are
the greatest resource and whatever is humanly possible is achievable by
appropriate ways and means.
With NLP you can become a New
Loveable Person.

——————————————————————————————————————-
V Ranganathan is a PCC-ICF , NLP Specialist  www.vrnlp.com

VR Quote Collection 5

LOUISE HAY affirmation1

கதை பழசு கருத்து புதுசு 21 -வெற்றியாளர்கள் புலம்புவதில்லை